The Lemon, aka My Car

I drive a 2006 Honda Accord V-6. It's shiny, it's new, it's comfortable, it's completely paid for! Those are the good aspects.

This is my third Honda - the first one was an ancient old Accord that had something like 230,000 miles on it at the end, and it was still running great with no major problems. My second one was a white 1998 Civic coupe that was also awesome... I had it till this year. There was never anything wrong with it and everything still worked perfectly when I sold it.

So by this year I'd become some kind of Honda loyalist, and I got another one.

First of all after dealing with El Cerrito Honda, I was ready to just drive the new car right off the Golden Gate Bridge, but that's a story for another day... it's a story that ended with me dropping a warty Japanese pumpkin into one of their toilets because I was so mad. (It was around Halloween, and I work at a vegetable company, and I just happened to have some pumpkins and gourds in the car.) If you live in Northern California and you HAVE A VAGINA, and you want to buy a Honda - Don't go to El Cerrito Honda! They are shady, they lie, and if you want to pay for a car outright rather than finance it, they treat you like complete shit!

Shortly after getting car, we noticed a rattling sound. Turns out the muffler was not properly secured. But before Honda admitted that the muffler was not secured, we first had to deal with them telling us, "Ummm, yeah. I don't hear it." Finally after much nonsense, they actually looked under the car and determined that yes, the muffler needed to be secured.

The glove compartment doesn't line up properly, so at night, you always see this sliver of light coming from the glove compartment. "Yeah, well, sometimes these things are just like that," is what I was told by Honda.

Now, the dash rattles. Rattle, rattle, rattle. Please!!! Neither of my other cars rattled. Twelve years old and 230,000 miles and the old car did not rattle!!! "I don't hear it," said the Honda service technician. I hate him! I hate Honda! I hate El Cerrito Honda. I hate Honda of San Fancisco's service department. I will never again buy a Honda! I want to get personalized license plates that say LEMON06!!!