The Big Duds of Winter

It's officially spring and time to reflect on my closet and all the things I stupidly spent money on and never wore last winter. (This exercise is not to beat oneself up, but rather to learn something about one's own taste, fashion sense, preferences and future expenditures.)

I actually did remarkably well; most of these are small items:

1.) Lush Charity Pot body lotion.
I was told by someone who works at one of the shops that the lotion smells like a less-strong version of their Honey I Washed the Kids soap. which smells like honey. It does not. It smells yucky and flowery and kind of like Jergens. It's like Essence of H'ospital, or eau de Nursing Home. Lush stuff is nice, though, and somewhat pricey, and coveted by some people, so I urged DD, "Take it to your work and put it in the bathroom or kitchen." He refused, saying he didn't want to smell it on anyone. I haven't taken it to my work either. (there's a shared refrigerator and a small grubby kitchen at my work, and any food that anyone brings to share, from stale doughnuts to an aging two liter of flat Coke to an unmarked brick of smelly cheese will be gobbled up quickly, but as for highly-fragranced smelly luxury lotion, I don't think anyone will want it)

2. a Harajuku Lovers Angel Kitty purse
I don't know what I was thinking. It felt cheap and plastic-like. It looked cheap and plastic-like. It was small and couldn't really hold any stuff.

3. a pair of Hue brand mustard yellow opaque tights
I don't even remember what I planned to wear these tights with, but they're so ugly, and mustard yellow is such a bad color on me, even far away from my face down there on my legs and feet! They're still in their package.

4. a pink lucite cube choker necklace
Chokers never look good on me. I have a very short neck, and chokers only bisect the neck, cutting it into two even shorter halves. It's like my head is sitting right on top of the choker necklace. I already know this, and yet-- Behold, the pink lucite choker!

6. Do bad makeup purchases even count? That's a whole 'nother can of whoop ass. There's a whole category of my bad makeup purchases, a category called "Lipsticks which are Paler than my Own Lips and which make Me Look Like the Walking Dead." This category includes MAC lipstick colors Snob, Pink Plaid, Craving, Pervette, and Creme de La Femme, among others.